How does one begin? Perhaps one begins by removing “one” and replacing it with “I.” How do I begin? Yes, that feels more aligned with what I wanted to do. …
Sometimes we force ourselves to say things. We don’t want to say them, but something in us said that we told ourselves we would say them, so we do. It’s …
What does it take to convince me that this is real? What does it take to convince you? It has been maybe a month since many of us in the …
I haven’t slept well in, well, a very long time. And I’m ashamed to admit it. You see, having worked specifically on emotions for the last eight years, I put …
I think I spend a lot of my time trying to understand others. I try to understand what they’re thinking, what they want, who they are. And more often than …
I spoke with my accountability buddy earlier and it helped me see my life from a different angle. For this book-writing group, we have been assigned an accountability buddy and …
I think I’m yawn deprived. When I look at other mammals, especially dogs and cats, I notice how they seem to yawn when they’re tired. They yawn before they fall …
I helped someone yesterday in muting the notifications on her phone. After she did it, said to me how dumb she felt. I replied that all of us are dumb …
I never notice how loud a place is until I have to record. In the moments before I just started to write, I heard the floorboards creek overhead, the water …
Last night, I told myself to start moving slowly. To intentionally slow down when walking, speaking, moving, breathing, looking, and even singing that song in my head. Trying to take …
Love scares the hell outta me. I’ve seen it hurt me and hurt many others. Maybe it’s not the love that hurt, but how quickly the love went from intense …
Logic doesn’t seem to be working. I converse with people and see how they’re saying one thing and doing another and I try to show that to them, and ooooo …
I’m noticing that in the mornings, I’m tending to write about what it’s like to wake up in the mornings—more about what’s going on with me internally than what’s going …
I really need to tell them. I sat down to type this and the washer and dryer were going full speed and were LOUD. Goodness they were loud. When I …
Is it OK to change the rules in the middle of the game? That’s the question I’ve been asking myself over the last five days as I’ve been on this …
Last night, I started watching a documentary about Michael Jordan. I grew up idolizing this man, everything from his jumpshot to his tongue sticking out. He seemed to have the …
Oil futures just went down to $5 per barrel. I believe gas prices in the US are now possibly less than $1 per gallon. Wow, what a change one month …
So, apparently the price of crude oil didn’t go to $5 per barrel, what did was the futures price of crude oil for May 2020—and about an hour after I …
“I’m not a morning person.” At least, that’s what I’ve told myself for years, but I’m starting to questions its validity. Is it the full truth or just a story …
What happened to zoning out? Ya know, just staring off into space, there but not there? Perhaps you call it spacing out, or some other term for that blank stare …
The other day I said that sometimes I’ll say to myself: “I don’t know…and I don’t need to know,” and then my body relaxes. While it’s true that I do …
I feel afraid that I’ll overwhelm people. Sometimes this means I feel worried that I’ll be too much. Sometimes it means I feel worried I’ll say too much. In this …
I don’t know how to feel when I watch videos about politics. I’m starting to notice that I absorb the emotions of the people speaking. For example, when I watch …
As I puff out my beard, I think about the decisions that Abraham Lincoln and many of the previous presidents of the United States had to make. I try to …
I don’t know what to say. Sometimes I get the feeling that I have to say something, but nothing comes to me. Right now, I know that I’m supposed to …
It just took one line to make me cry. One line for which I have been yearning for politicians to say. I can’t remember exactly how he said it, but …
“But it’s not funny,” I say to myself after I laugh at what Trump said on TV. I’m not laughing from joy, I’m laughing from a blend of anger, surprise, …
I like to learn. When people ask me why I’m writing this book and specifically, why I’m writing it in this format, I tell them that more than anything, I …
I posted a video of me dancing, people laughed, I took it down. I rarely will film myself doing anything and since my parents were out of the house at …
It’s not about the bad dancing. Well, partially yes, but that’s not all of it. It’s about people seeing my long beard, the items in my childhood family room, the …
“More here, less there.” It’s one of the mantras I created in 2012 when I first started to work on emotions full-time and to build iFeelio. It is one that …
I think I fear being one-dimensional. That people will see me and only think X and not A, B, C, 1, 2, 3, and some alpha and beta as well …
Two years. That’s probably the maximum amount of time that I’ve committed to something—a project, a relationship, a job, an apartment, or even a city. I’m sure there are a …
9:00AM My knee just cracked. Finally. I had been feeling a need for it to crack for about 30 minutes and maybe sitting down did the trick. For the last …
1:00PM If you choose option A, people die. If you choose option B, people die. If you choose option C, D, E, F, and all the way to Z, people …
5:00PM Who am I too write a book? Who am I too write a blog? Who am I to do or say anything? I spoke with another author from the …
9:00AM “I dont know. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know.” I said this to myself repeatedly this morning after I hit snooze/changed the time …
1:00PM I sat at the kitchen table a few minutes ago, deeply focused on fixing the website and then my mom asked me something or handed me something from the …
5:00PM There’s a new app that people are talking about on Twitter called Clubhouse. I saw today a few people posting about how many hours they’ve spent on the app, …
9:00AM In just a few moments, I will head to the local supermarket to pick up our order. We reserved a time slot approximately one week ago and placed an …
1:00PM I was just reading an article talking about Hitler, Stalin, and other leaders who tried to shape society, especially in the direction of a utopia. While the article didn’t …
5:00PM As I walked near my old middle school, I noticed that the fence around tennis courts had been torn down and orange barrels were blocking off the space. I …
9:00AM I woke up this morning and tried a new tactic to relax my body—I tried to reach my arms down as far as I could by my side. I …
1:00PM Let’s say I’m a public figure who wants to hide something. It can be something that I’ve done that it’s illegal, something immoral, or something about which I personally …
5:00PM I like cover songs. I really enjoy when an individual or a band will take a song from the past and reinterpret it, adding their own personality and flavor …
9:00AM Many people in the US are now calling for the shelter-at-home/stay-at-home orders to be lifted, saying that forcing someone to stay home is fascism and that this country is …
1:00PM I really appreciate when someone is good at what they do. I was just reading an essay about social networks and the inherent status-seeking competition that the popular ones …
5:00PM I wonder what society would look like if it had more reconciliation and less retribution? More healing and less vengeance? If I feel hurt by something and I think …
9:00AM The sky is blue, the sun is shining, and spring is arriving. Today is May. We spent all of April in our houses on lockdown, doing our best to …
1:00PM Emotional conflict. Perhaps that’s what it is. For the past eight years, I’ve been searching for ways to describe the work that I do, to hone the essence of …
5:00PM “Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to resolve conflict through peaceful means.” —Ronald Reagan I would create another version of it as well: “Love is …
9:00AM As I type this, I feel a strong desire to use the bathroom. In some cultures, it’s OK to say this, in others, it’s not OK. By cultures, I …
1:00PM Why don’t I want to show how I feel? Why don’t I want people to know more about my body, what I’m thinking, what I’ve done, and other aspects …
5:00PM I reflect on the emotional conflict that I’m currently experiencing and what keeps coming up is the conflict that I’ve avoided. There are at least five people, off the …
9:00AM Everything is starting to feel the same. Same conversations. Same people. Same foods. Same thing, different day. I mean, the weather is changing, but that’s about it. I guess …
1:00PM “I want to step into my role as a world leader.” I said this statement a few years ago, I think 2015, at the end of a training in …
5:00PM I’m not sure what to write. I’m sure this has happened before, but also can’t remember if I was just so honest about it. I just came in from …
9:00AM This is the 58th straight writing that I have started on time. In a way, I’m shocked. After going quite a few years without a steady 9-5 job, I’ve …
1:00PM “We’re facing a mental health crisis.” Almost every time I read the phrase “mental health,” I cringe. Or maybe it’s more of frustration bursting out of my pores, wanting …
5:00PM I often will say that I’m not a computer programmer, that I don’t understand this stuff, and really, I’m just a beginner or amateur. And that may be true. …
9:00AM I keep having these weird dreams. Or maybe they’re not that weird, they just seem weird for the times that we’re in. I dreamt about playing basketball in the …
1:00PM “We made a conscious decision to not fight in front to you children,” my mom said to me a few years ago. This conversation came a few months or …
5:00PM At 1AM last night (or early this morning), President Trump sent out multiple tweets, calling many of his opponents different unflattering and attacking names, including some racial slurs. He …
9:00AM How do surprises and secrecy go together? Last night, I was thinking about writing this book and how I haven’t told a lot of people that I’m doing it. …
1:00PM I researched a little bit on secretive cultures to see if I could learn something from it. I stumbled on articles about Apple and Snapchat and the corporate cultures …
5:00PM I’ve been growing a quarantine beard. I haven’t trimmed it since we’ve been in quarantine, now, who knows, approaching two months. In the beginning of this lockdown, I thought …
9:00AM Can one be too open? Can one share too much information with someone? I heard someone say TMI the other day, which stands for “too much information,” and normally …
1:00PM “Show her with your actions,” my friend said to me. But how do I know that she’ll interpret my actions in the way I intend her to interpret them? …
5:00PM Today, the U.S. Department of Justice (DOJ) dropped its prosecution of Michael Flynn for lying to the FBI. He had pled guilty to the crime, and for some reason, …
9:00AM It is a time of tremendous fear. Many of us around the world are afraid to leave our homes, afraid we’ll contract the virus, afraid we’ll lose our jobs, …
1:00PM I wonder how much stress all these secrets are causing to us. I wonder how much we withhold at the thought it will cause a problem, but really, the …
5:00PM The good old days. That time when everything just worked and life just flowed. Except those times probably never existed, we just remember them that way. I just imagined …
9:00AM It’s very loud. The furnace kicked on because for some reason in May, the temperature dropped below freezing outside. I think it’s about 32F right now. OK, it stopped. …
1:00PM “I know you don’t care about me at all. You’re probably kissing her and having sex with her,” she said to me before leaving the bed and walking out …
5:40PM I screwed up. I knew I would at some point. I was sitting there waiting for dinner and realized that I hadn’t written yet, and normally dinner is at …
9:00AM “How are you?” It’s such a simple question, yet can be so difficult to answer. Even more challenging: “How are you feeling?” Or “How do you feel?” I remember …
1:00PM Plato supposedly said, “Those that tell the stories, rule society.” Yuval Noah Harari, author of Sapiens and Homo Deus, says that what has made us advance as a human …
5:00PM I’m back on track. 5PM just as before. Feels good. I had the conversation with my parents about the health insurance. I think so often we—no, let me stop, …
9:00:45AM I started just on time, or maybe 45 seconds late. I don’t know why I rush through these things in the morning. I hate to rush in the morning. …
1:00PM Sometimes I just have to take a breath and realize that not everyone understands the world in the way that I do. I think I wrote about this before, …
5:00PM Some days I just feel antsy. Not sure from where the word originates, maybe it relates to having ants in one’s pants. I just have this desire to move, …
9:05AM Click. It’s not working. Click click click. It’s not working. Shit. Software update. Click. It’s not working. Oh. My webinar package expired. Pay for another month. There it goes. …
1:00PM I really did not want to pull away from the TV to come type this. The U.S. Supreme Court is hearing opening arguments for a case called Trump v …
5:00PM I saw my neighbor while I was out playing basketball. He’s maybe 20 years older than me and came back to visit his parents. I probably haven’t seen him …
9:00AM How often do we prepare for the things that we do in life? I mean, really think about what we are going to do before we do it? What …
1:00PM Trickle down. Many of us when we hear that phrase will think of trickle down economics, a belief proposed by, I’m not sure, maybe Reagan, in the 1980s about …
5:00PM I want to follow up on what I wrote this afternoon. While I do not believe much in trickle down economics, I do believe strongly in another TDE: trickle …
9:01AM “Gravity, is working against me,” said John Mayer in his song, I believe titled, “Gravity.” I had a dream last night where I think I was floating. It’s not …
1:00PM I can’t stand to watch Trump on television anymore. I can’t stand to read his tweets. I can’t stand to see how he communicates with the world. He seems …
5:00PM I see a lot of division on the internet these days—much more than I actually see in person. In person, people seem to get along quite well. I remember …
9:00AM When the chatter in the brain stops, it can be so quiet outside. I sit here and soak in the silence. I find it amazing how it is almost …
1:00PM Let’s talk about sex, baby. I rarely talk about sex in a public forum, maybe because of my American culture, maybe because my family didn’t talk about it much …
5:00PM Distribution. Taking one thing from here and delivering it to there. I wonder why we don’t talk about it more. When I was trying to sell solar lanterns in …
9:00AM Normally when I write these, I wake up and start going full speed. I type as fast as I can, often trying to reach a certain number of words, …
12:30PM I’m sweating. And oh how good does it feel. The sun came out, the air warmed, and I found myself moving the cars out of the driveway so that …
5:00PM I feel sweaty. I feel grateful that I feel sweaty two times in the same day, putting my body into motion. I feel a bit playful and hopeful to …
10:00AM I almost made it. Thirty-two straight days of using Zoom Webinar three times per day to broadcast these writing sessions. Despite no one really showing up (and me not …
1:00PM The world doesn’t need to be saved. My friends don’t need to be saved. My mom, dad, and sister don’t need to be saved. I don’t need to be …
5:00PM “You’re making me feel angry.” How often do we say this or a variation of it? That someone is making us feel something? I have a tendency to do …
9:00AM It happened. Somehow my body finally relaxed and I slept well. I feel so embarrassed to say that in these 35 days, last night was probably the only night …
1:00PM What if joining a conspiracy theory were similar to quitting a drug? A few minutes ago, a friend of mine mentioned that he saw a pattern that people who …
5:00PM I feel sad. In sitting down to type this, I realized that tomorrow is the last day of writing. I can’t believe that it has been 34 days already. …
9:00AM I’ve talked about this before, maybe yesterday, I can’t remember. I’m going to talk about it again because I think sometimes shedding new light on the same topic can …
1:00PM I started this experiment for quite a few reasons. I wanted to get better at writing extemporaneously, I wanted to have something to do to pass the time during …
5:00PM For the 105th time, I heard the clock ring before starting this. I heard the sump pump kick on. I pressed the same sequence of buttons on the keyboard …