9:01AM
“Gravity, is working against me,” said John Mayer in his song, I believe titled, “Gravity.”
I had a dream last night where I think I was floating. It’s not uncommon for me to have these dreams. Sometimes I’ll be running and jump into the air and somehow I’ll be able to float above the clouds, almost flying across the world all from a simple jump. I rarely have a dream of me actually flying—flapping my arms or wings—but somehow seem to have this ability to float, almost as if I’m Michael Jordan and have infinite hang time.
I woke up feeling really groggy and quite tight. I wonder how these two are related. I tried to relax the body and more than anything, work with gravity, instead of against it. I noticed that when I let my body sink with gravity, my diaphragm started to open up, the tightness from my body started to disappear, bones started to crack and realign, and I felt more ready to sleep.
I believe that much of my pain in life is trying to fight against gravity. I don’t know how scientifically valid this next point is, but I believe that a lot of it is me being so stuck in my head and stuck in the clouds that my body is trying to lift itself up, and in doing so, is directly fighting against gravity that is trying to pull itself down. Jaw tension is from holding the jaw up, not letting it fall down. Shoulder tension is from holding the shoulders up, not letting them fall down. Foot tension may be from trying to stand up tall, not letting the body feel down into the ground. It seems I fight against gravity a lot.
I think I’ve often dreamed of going to space or going to the Moon for this exact reason: no gravity or very little of it. To leap and bound across the moon surface, knowing that gravity doesn’t yield such a strong power on me could also make my body feel so free: much less fighting.
I know I ramble a lot in these essays and I wonder if it will be helpful for some of you readers. When I let myself fight with gravity instead of fight against it, it seems to help me and maybe that will help you as well.
My mind jumps to martial arts and how many instructors will talk about the importance of grounding the foot to give a strong punch. That the force comes from the ground, actually, and not from the fist. This says to me that when we fight with gravity, we might be stronger.
I wonder if some people have dreams where they’re stuck below the ground, or they’re sinking so deep because they aren’t fighting against gravity. Perhaps it works both ways. I think I seem to fight too much against it but maybe there are some who sacrifice too much to it.
9:11AM
