“You hurt me. So I’m gonna hurt you. And then we’ll be even.”
It astonishes me how we seek revenge towards people who cause us pain and then assume that those same people (or people associated with them) will not seek revenge upon us, in a never-ending escalation of hurt. Sure, if you punch me in the stomach, and then I retaliate by punching you in the face, you may stop…for now. You may never punch me again. Instead, you may distance yourself from me, because who in their right mind would want to associate with a dude who punches you in the face. And in the process of staying away from me, you alienate me. We used to be close friends and now you’re gone. It hurts me to see you gone. All because I swung my measly fist at your face. I didn’t mean it. Now I hurt more than getting punched in the face. So I get angry at you for running away. I say mean things about you to other people. I’ll teach you for running away from me. As a result, these other people start to avoid you. Now you hurt even more.
So what do you do now? Attack me? Avoid me? Do whatever it takes to instill more pain?
What about love me?
What about love yourself?
This cycle of hurt seems to go on indefinitely until one person has the courage to feel the pain and process it. To grieve the loss. To get back to the joy of living.
Then, instead of spreading the pain, we spread the joy.
I think at the end of the day, we just want people to feel what we’re feeling. If I’m tired, I want someone to be tired with me. If I’m excited, I want someone to feel excited with me. If hurt, I want someone to feel hurt with me.
Are you going to continue the cycle of hurt or will you process your pain so that you and others can get back to the joy of living?
I don’t know about you, but I like joy.