A few months back, I was walking with my friend who has been a yoga instructor for many years. As we strolled down the street, she commented to me how the woman in front of us had a tight left hip flexor. How the man across the street had tight shoulders. How I seemed to be walking with a limp. And I didn’t even know I was walking with a limp!
I asked her how she knew all these things, and she responded, somewhat shocked that I would ask such a question, “Honey, I teach yoga and give massage therapy — all I do is study the body.”
Feeling more self-conscious at this point, I started to acquiesce. Then she said, “Oh, don’t get me wrong, everyone has some nuance to their posture, even me.” And then she listed 3 or 4 things that were “off” with her posture.
I have always shied away labeling myself an expert in many things because I thought I had to be perfect in it to be an expert. “Are you a programmer?” No. “Are you an engineer?” No. “Are you a salsa dancer?” No. Because in my mind, I was comparing myself to the “experts” who were perfect. The programmers that can whip out fully functioning software in minutes. The engineers who build hot tubs from scratch. The salsa dancers who sweep across the floor with grace.
I had believed that an expert was someone who was SO good at what they did that everyone else failed in comparison. What I have found is that an expert is not someone who doesn’t struggle in their field of expertise, but rather someone who is fully aware of the struggles. Someone who spends a lot of their time and energy paying attention to their field. Reading, listening, seeing, touching, playing, investigating, and absorbing what it is their field has to offer. Not about being perfect, but being consistently curious.
So am I perfect in dealing with emotions? No way. I’m building these tools so that I can get better at these things. Am I an expert? Perhaps so. I’ve spent the last three years constantly soaking up this stuff and I feel no signs of that curiosity waning.
In which field(s) are you an imperfect expert?