Transcript
Hello and welcome to another daily Jimm. It is Wednesday, January 17th, 2024. And today I want to talk about rescue animals and knowing the back story of something or someone, maybe the title will be a little more concise.
So the idea is, um, my friends have a cat that was rescued or adopted, I think rescued. Um, and I was trying to interact with the cat earlier today and the cat ski seemed quite skittish, so slowly she's opening up, she'll come and she'll stiff my fingers a little bit and then she'll, but then she'll bolt and, I made a comment to my friend that I'm sitting here wondering what was the cat's backstory? Like what happened in this cat's life before they got the cat?
You know, how did this cat get to this point where she feels skittish? Um Is it around humans? Is it around male humans? Is it around specific type of male human? Is it a specific behavior? Is it a specific look? Is it a specific sound what triggers that in the cat and, what happened in the past that may have given this cat this uh memory and therefore these emotions that are predicting certain behaviors that will happen after this. Um We talked a little bit about how the cat, uh does not like when people will pack up things and the cat really doesn't like when people are like to be taken in the car. And so I really started thinking about this and it reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend uh earlier, and how often women will tell me, I don't want to hear about your experience with other women, especially about your ex. You talk about your ex all the time. I don't want to hear that. And for me, I'm like, but you don't want to know my backstory because me, I'm curious about where other people have been, what, you know, what they've gone through. So it helps inform me about how they might behave in the future. You know, what emotions or expectations do they have over my behaviors or over other people's behaviors so that I can try to not play into the story or play into the nightmare that they might have?
And so I think so often, you know, one of the things that I struggle with when it comes to animals is that the cat, the cat can't tell me, um which behavior of mine is. Um And, and you know, is making them feel afraid or scared or nervous or whatever, the cat can't even put that emotion into a word. So I have to try to look at its behavior and try to understand and I may guess its um feeling but not necessarily the context behind it. And I sure can't guess the cat's context from previous interactions with other humans. I have no idea maybe if there's something at the, the adoption agency or whatnot. But beyond that, I can't ask the cat, the cat, the cat can't respond but humans, we can respond and how does it change the way that we behave with others when we know what their context is? When we know what their back story is, we know how they got to the point where they are today.
So I think sometimes it frustrates me in relationships with other people. Like, well, I don't want to hear about your past and then I asked them about past relationships or past things in their life and they say, oh, I don't want to talk about my past. It's like, but if we don't talk about the past, the past, inform often informs the present and often informs the future. So if we're not communicating about these things, I'm kind of flying blind and just guessing and hoping that my behaviors don't stumble upon something that happened to you in the past that had a strong, uh, you know, uh, painful impact on you that therefore creates your expectations that it's going to happen again.
And I think I'm just yearning for people in general to. To talk more about what our back story in our context is because if I ask you, you know how you're feeling, you're like, I'm good. OK, why are you good? You know, or like if I ask what happened, you say, oh, this, maybe you'll give me the emotion, but you won't necessarily give the context. And um I think when we give these contexts, I think it's easier for us to realize that the other person is a human trying their best. And when we don't give the context, it's easy for us to have that distance and uncertainty. And um.
And frankly the question, what's wrong with us and why, why are they so distant from us? Why aren't they telling us? Why are they so skittish around me? Maybe it has very little to do with me. You know, this cat, maybe it has mostly to do with their owner that maybe abandoned them in the past and less to do with me. But if I don't know that, then it's easy. Even if I know it, I still may assume it's a lie. But if I know it, sometimes I can go, oh, it's not about me or it's not fully about me. Um And now this may sound like a very simple thing, but I wonder what impacts it can have on a very large level. I mean, is this a behavior that, you know, the not sharing of the context of the back stories is the behavior that could lead to much larger violence, uh male, female violence, you know, domestic violence or even things like war. So some late thing for you to think about on this Wednesday evening. Um, grateful to have you listen and talk to you soon.
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