Does maybe = no or does maybe = yes?
I think it depends on your math.
(see, math has a place in the world)
Let us set maybe = 0.5, no = 0, and yes = 1.
Therefore maybe = yes if we round 0.5 up to 1.
and maybe = no if we round 0.5 down to 0.
In elementary (primary) school, I was taught to round 0.5 up to 1. That anything less than 0.5, such as 0.43, would round down to 0, and anything greater or equal to 0.5 would round up to 1.
This same belief has leaked into my interpersonal relationships. If I think that anyone is at 0.5 confidence with something, I try to round them up (convince them) to 1.
“Will you hire me for this job? Not sure? Well, you should hire me for this reason, that reason, and a few others.”
“Will you go on a date with me? Not sure? (one week later) How about now? Still not sure? (two weeks later) Have you made a decision?”
“Will you come to my event? Not sure? Well, I’ll just assume that you’ll be there.”
What I’ve realized is that when I try to round people’s 0.5 up to 1, they will often resist and stay more firmly at 0.5, making it even harder for me to round it up.
What I’m proposing is that we change this mathematical rule for relationships. That when someone is a maybe, we round them down to no. So in this case, you round 0.5 down to 0. We can take this further and say that anything less than 1 we will round down to 0. It is not 1 unless it is 1, or it is not a yes unless it is a yes. If it has any uncertainty, it is therefore no, or zero.
Why do this? As Gary Vaynerchuk says when talking about sales, it takes a tremendous amount of time trying to convince maybe’s to be yes’s when there are plenty of yes’s out there. If I spend all my time trying to convince 0.5’s to be 1’s, I am missing out on my chance to interact with all the 1’s. All the ones who are certain that they want to hire me, all the ones who want to hang out with me, all the ones who want to help me with a project, all the ones who want to receive my gifts, all the ones who want to accept my offers.
Round down other people’s 0.5 to 0. Sometimes they’ll stay at 0. Sometimes they’ll round themselves up to 1. Whatever the case, for me, they’re a 0 unless they say they’re a 1.
I hope this makes as much sense to you as it does to me 😀